• 11
  • October
    2011

After Denver residents say the words "I want a divorce," is it really over? Maybe not. Some researchers say that even after a couple makes the decision to separate and goes about making arrangements to divide their property, create a child visitation schedule, etc. there may be a chance their marriage could still be saved. Then again, that raises the question of whether the marriage should be saved in the first place.

One major factor that helps determine whether patching things up after deciding to divorce is a good idea is how quickly a couple reached the decision to end their relationship. If you and your spouse decided to separate after an argument about who should load the dishwasher, for example, you two probably did not think things through. A Denver clinical psychologist said seeking counseling or reconciliation services can help a couple determine if divorce is really the right step for them. It would be better, of course, if you and your spouse sought these services before you decided to divorce, but that does not mean the advice and insight of a professional counselor or therapist cannot be helpful even if it is after the fact.

Of course, some marriages should not be saved. Seeking a divorce is sometimes the best option for people. Filing for divorce does not mean you are a bad person or that you are a quitter. Ideally, it should mean you and your spouse thought long and hard about your relationship and realized it would be better for you to separate.

In addition to making an appointment with a therapist or counselor to discuss your relationship, it might be a good idea to have a sit-down with a divorce or family law attorney. This attorney could explain to you how the divorce process works and might be able to speak in general terms about how it would apply to your relationship ("in general terms" because details and precision require a lot more information and detail than you could give in an initial consultation.) Even if you decide that divorce is not right for you at this time, that is still helpful information to have.


Source: The Detroit Free Press, "Decision to divorce includes uncertainty, and many people change their minds," Oct. 2, 2011